The search continues...

I’ve often been asked why are most of my poems, writings and thoughts in general so very dark (please refer below). I’ve been criticized more than once for my obsession with pain and suffering. Well, I don’t blame them, and honestly I myself have no clue where it stems from.

Recently I happened to read an interview of Anurag Kashyap in the weekly Tehelka, the man whose work spans some of the hardest hitting and gritty films like Satya, Kaun, Shool, Water, etc. I greatly admire and respect the man, and so was more than keen on reading the interview. He talked about what Javed Akhtar had once mentioned, that out of anger stems cynicism and out of cynicism comes humor. He spoke about how he really agreed with Akhtar Saab, but that he’s still waiting for his final transition (humor). Now, Anurag Kashyap as I found out from the interview, is someone who’s had an extremely tough childhood, one filled with abuse, addiction, etc, and one can expect a man after going thru such an experience to be filled with seething anger. But I’m at a complete loss to explain my reasons for being so.

I’ve had an extremely normal childhood and life in general. My family belonged to millions of the great Indian middle class, one that came of age over the past 15 years or so. So while I didn’t really grow up in luxury, I certainly wasn’t deprived of most of my whims either. And the love that I’ve received growing up, has like most who know me since then would more than agree, made me a spoilt child. Not true. Well, not entirely. So I’m at a complete loss to understand where this anger in me originates.

I’m still mulling over it…